mandalicious_x (llnawtyll) wrote,

heres a little bit of how i've been feeling lately.

i used to always want to be a lawyer. i think for the first fifteen years of my life i could dream of nothing else. i loved debating. what happened, you ask? my first boyfriend happened. boys have helped me to learn that i do not like arguing so much. sure, the occasional argument is wonderful. but i am BEYOND SICK of having the SAME ARGUMENT/CONVERSATION with multiple people on a daily basis.

this is all very silly. some people just dont understand that i do not have to explain myself or my decisions to them. obviously i wasn't going to do something i did not feel was justified. and as far as i'm concerned, it was perfectly reasonable. let's just put it out there; i hate the fact that many of my friends feel compelled to make smoking their number one priority. but, that is their choice. however, when it begins to affect me, i begin to care a little more.

pretty much, i'll do what i think is right. you can like it or not like it, but that's how it's going to be.

i actually feel okay right now. i'm liking that. i looked at my old journal entries and it seemed like i could never stay happy for more than a week. maybe this is what i need; a break from boys.

i leave for italy in two days. i have not packed. but i am absolutely thrilled to go. i cannot wait to get away from here. things are retarded; even my friends.

let me just say its ridiculous how some people are. one minute you're number one in their life and the next it's like you were never important. am i being ridiculous to think that i should come before boys? my friends have always came before the boyfriends in my life. i thought i would be treated with the same respect, i guess i thought wrong.

and on that bitchy note, valete.
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